Fried Chicken & Lentils

Everyday Life with Jodie and Susan

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Pay No Attention to That Natural Disaster Behind the Curtain

It’s election time.  And the economy, as you may have noticed when you got your pink slip, is down the tubes.  So, the droughts, floods, Frankenstorms, and other things that happen “only once in a lifetime” or “once in 100 years” that keep happening in my single lifetime (or in my child’s short lifetime) again and again aren’t getting that much attention except when they shut down the entire east coast.

There is no global climate change (or if there is, it’s not from anything we’ve done).  And I am the great and powerful Oz.


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I Convince Mitt Romney that Tax Rates Should Be Higher

Yeah, I know.  It’s pretty great.  This is how I did it.  I dreamed that an old friend and I were at her trailer and we fixed a lot of good Kentucky food, including barbeque, which we served to Mitt Romney, then I told him some hard-hitting facts like that in FDR’s time the superrich had to pay a 98% tax rate and that’s what made the 50’s and 60’s so great for the average person-that some people didn’t have extreme wealth while others had so little.  Then I said, “If you had grown up here in this trailer, would you be where you are today?”  So, what with the great food and clever arguments, he saw that I was right.  I felt pretty good about it all.

Then I dreamed about this gothic church and how I couldn’t wait to go see A Christmas Carol performed there.  Not sure how that fits into the overall scheme of things, but I guess I am just looking ahead.  Told you I was going to share my dreams with the world-they are so totally worthwhile.

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Susan, Look What We Have to Look Forward To!

“Poverty rates for males and females are the same throughout childhood, but increase for women during their childbearing years and again in old age. The poverty gap between women and men widens significantly between ages 18 and 24—20.6 percent of women are poor at that age, compared to 14.0 percent of men. The gap narrows, but never closes, throughout adult life, and it more than doubles during the elderly years.”

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Rotate Your Stock

I had another of my genius get-rich-quick schemes and I roped my friend Heather into making 2000-plus momos with me and forced WD (husband who shall be henceforth known on the blog as WD) to help all weekend to make all these dumplings because I was sure they would sell like crazy and we’d walk away with a couple of cool thousand dollar bills in our pockets.  After slaving for literally hours until the skin on my thumb and first finger was sore from touching so much dough (flour, not cash) over and over, we stashed the product in Susan’s freezer between shifts at the festival, then we walked away with literally less money than the booth rent.  Heather was cool with that and still has like 1500 momos in her freezer.  The whole point is that the stock is starting to get old and needs to be eaten up, so, hey, Heather, how about coming across with the goods?  I’m just asking.

Your friend in dumplings,


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I Spent All Day Yesterday Thinking I Should Go Outside

Yesterday’s weather was an autumn sparkler, leaves falling, sunny and warm, everything reflecting the special glory of looking beautiful before it dies off for the winter, a last little scream against the inevitable, tricking me into thinking I had plenty of time to get out there and enjoy the day.  The morning was cool, but the afternoon was very warm on my pale skin when I shuffled out there aimlessly before coming back in.  I fooled around in the house, reading, loafing, piddling around with some sewing I am doing, making feeble attempts at straightening up the constant messes that appear from the hole in the universe (where our socks usually go instead, which I think I have narrowed down to starting somewhere in the curled-up edges of fitted sheets in our closets because I have found plenty of socks there, just on the cusp of being sucked into the void).  I had almost made up my mind to go when a cloud came up over the sun making it just a little too cool just to sit out.  By evening a cold, late Fall rain had come up and today is dull and cold, not making going outside appealing at all.

I suppose this is the lesson of the ant and grasshopper, only I can’t ever remember who was the good one and who was the lazy one.