I’ve heard that freedom ain’t free, but then again, Congress passed an important law a few years ago clearly spelling out that all Americans are entitled to “Free Dumb Fries” and would no longer have to be subjected to those horrible French fries that we’ve been, well, subjected to ever since TJ went to France. I know what you’re thinking–Finally, proof that our diets are making us not just fat, but also less intelligent, but wait a minute. I am talking potatoes boiled in oil–FREE! The only thing is, places around here are still charging a dollar or more for FREE DUMB FRIES, which the government guaranteed us as a FREE replacement for French fries. It takes a while for these things to trickle down (just ask Ronald Reagan, who, I am sure, would have 100% supported Free Dumb Fries or maybe fried jelly beans, anyway), but still, come on. I bet I could get them in France.